GotSchmucked.com

Police in Mississippi said that a woman dressed in only a bikini allegedly stole a car, and later attempted to rob a RV Center.   Police said that Morgan Haley, 24 approached the carjacking victim in the woman’s driveway and demanded that she give up her car.  The victim was allowed to remove her children from the car before Haley drove off.  Haley then drove the car to Southaven RV Center and demanded money from employees claiming she had a gun.  Employees wrestled Haley to the ground and discovered the “gun” was a cell phone.

Lesson 1:  If you are going to car jack, or rob a RV store, you might want to wear more than a bikini
Lesson 2:  Don’t try to pass off a cell phone as a gun
Lesson 3:  If you are drunk or under the influence of drugs, you may want to think twice before leaving the house in only your bikini
Lesson 4: Don’t mess with RV Center employees, they can kick you’re a**

Read more (UPI.com)

A man with a blood alcohol level of more than twice the legal limit picked the wrong place to pull over and sleep it off.  Authorities said a confused drunk driver pulled onto the front lawn of the Michigan State Police post in Paw Paw Michigan.   Police say the man drove onto the front lawn after overshooting the station’s parking lot.

The driver told officers that he couldn’t remember where he was coming from, but was on his way home.  Apparently, the driver had simply chosen the post as a resting spot.  Police say the suspect six previous arrests for drunken driving.  Schmuck!

More here: (Odd News)

A Iowa City Iowa 19-year-old man used cash stolen from a bank robbery to pay a bond for an outstanding warrant.   Apparently the man was an accomplice in the robbery by casing the bank and talking with a teller and leaving.  A second man armed with a handgun then robbed the bank.   Police say the suspect used bank money to pay for a bond for an outstanding theft charge then went shopping at Wal-mart.

Read more here (Yahoo Odd News)

Some Schmucks never learn… A judge sentenced a 63-year-old man to three years in prison after his 18 conviction for driving on a revoked license.   Apparently, the man has been arrested for driving without a license  17 previous times dating back to the mid 1970’s.  

Read more here: (dailyherald)

A mugger picked the wrong time to try an mug a woman in her 50’s.  The woman was walking in Edmonton Alberta at 6:45 AM when she was approached by man who demanded her purse and laptop. After a brief struggle, the man fled with her stuff with a unidentified witness in pursuit.  Here is where it gets good, Kitwana Jones of the Edmonton Eskimos (Canadian Football League) noticed the pursuit and joined in the chase.  The two men were able to catch and subdue the mugger-schmuck in a nearby alley.  The woman’s belongings were recovered, and another schmuck is now behind bars.

Kudos to Mr. Jones, and the other unidentified man for tackling, tagging, and bagging a mugger schmuck!

Read more here: (UPI)

Here we have a sad but true story of a con-man-schmuck who duped a love starved woman to steal $11 million from the state of Colorado. The ex-boyfriend is a real schmuck. Not only is he a con-man, but a married one at that.

You can’t help but feel bad for this poor woman that needed love so desperately that she fell for the duping of this scumbag schmuck. Apparently, the con-man-schmuck used the money to pay off delinquent child support, land deals, diamond jewelry, cars and business ventures. The love starved victim/accomplice only received some jewelry and trips while the schmuck kept/used the rest for himself. To top it off, the scumbag claimed he thought the money came from the accomplice’s family trust and that she tried to lure him away from his wife. What a schmuck!

 

See the gory details here:(MSNBC)

Well, at least he admits he’s an idiot.  There may be hope for him yet.   This lucky Schmuck wanders off for hike with only light clothing and a snack, gets lost for 12 days and gets paid $160K for his story.  Wow, being a Schmuck pays pretty well!  Read more here:(Google)

Okay, granted I am still skeptical about global warming and who to believe, but this schmuck thinks that Americans are responsible for China’s greenhouse gas emissions, and we should pay for it! Hmmn, last time I check Mr. Political Schmuck, the American people have no decision making power over determining pollution regulations in China. The article goes on to point out that China recently surpassed the United States as the largest emitter of greenhouse gases, and that these emissions come largely from producing steel, cement, aluminum, paper and chemicals most of which are consumed in China rather than exported. Grab on to your wallets, people… our government has been overrun by schmucks who think we should pay just about everything… Read more here: (Reuters)

Life is not always a bed of roses for NFL has-beens. In this interview Bernie admits he is an idiot, and does not know how to run a dishwasher or even wash his clothes. Seems his soon to be ex-wife agrees with his self proclamation. Filing for bankruptcy, his body battered and damaged from years of poundings, a messy divorce, you can’t help but almost feel sorry for the guy. Yet, his own words seem to say it all… “I was 25 and everyone was telling me that I was the smartest; now I’m 45 and realize I’m an idiot,” he says. “I’m 45 and immature. I don’t like being 45.” Read the full article